Affliction
by stevie419
Summary: I was once told by a very dear friend that 'everyone makes mistakes'. It's just not everyone makes mistakes like I made.I will live with the guilt forever, it haunting both my sleep and my consciousness. My name is Draco Malfoy and this is my story.
1. Prologue

**Affliction**

**Prologue**

I was once told by a very dear friend that 'everyone makes mistakes', she was right I suppose. It's just not everyone makes mistakes like I made, I made them over and over and it wasn't always because of the things I did. The major mistakes were the things I didn't do, the ones that can't be reversed because nothing was done in the first place.

When I was just 16 I made a mistake, the biggest mistake and regret of my life, one that can never be erased, one that will always be embedded deep within my heart and following me everywhere I go for the rest of my existence. I will never be able to escape from this mistake; I will live with the guilt forever, everyday and every night, it haunting both my sleep and my consciousness.

My name is Draco Malfoy and this is my story.

**This is my next FanFic and is a work in progress, I have not given up on my other ones but really want to write this one and couldn't wait until I finished the others so I thought I would post the Prologue I may not start posting this for a while as I want to get as much down as possible, so that I can post regularly, instead of sparingly . Thanks for reading. x**


	2. Chapter 1: For me but for you

**Chapter 1- For me but For you**

I was born the son of Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy, and the younger brother of Scorpius Malfoy on June 5th 1980, and from then on I was reminded of this fact every day of my life. I was a Malfoy, one in a very long line of pure blooded witches and wizards, and this was something that I could never escape, this was the family I had been born into and the name would follow me forever, whether I liked it or not.

It was also something, my older brother Scorpius could never accept and my father hated this, the fact that his first born son was not like him, not like him at all and that his son would defy him over and over again. Scorpius had told me that when I was born, my father vowed to make sure I didn't turn out like my older sibling and that Lucius would do everything in his power to have a son that respected and obeyed the Malfoy name, so that when I was old enough I could continue to uphold our reputation of a powerful wizarding family.

Scorpius was 8 years older than me and sometimes I wondered what had happened before I was born, to make him so unlike my father? Why Scorpius never thought of Lucius Malfoy as a role model, but more of a bad example? Everything Scorpius and I had ever been taught by our parents should have made us bad people, and I believe I would have been, if it wasn't for Scorpius being there to keep me grounded. He taught me the truth about what was right and what was wrong, and if he hadn't been there taking my beatings for me, maybe I would have just given in for an easy life and behaved the way father bought me up.

I owe Scorpius everything, without him I believe I would be a very different person. Don't get me wrong things never worked out the way I had dreamed, in fact my life was far from what I imagined, but it was still better than it would have been without my older brother there to guide me, and at least he taught me to have a conscience, to understand that my mistake was a bad one. At least I had learnt to feel guilt and at least I have been able to sacrifice my happiness for the mistake I made, I needed to be able to do that. Things are bad, but they would be worse if I couldn't show how sorry I was. Scorpius never taught me to feel this directly, in fact he would probably be disappointed in my reaction to what I have done: he would want me to move on, to live my life to the full, to smile again, but I can't, however I wouldn't have been taught to have feelings, to feel pity, to feel remorse, guilt, or hurt without him. I need to feel this way to pay my respects, in my opinion I deserve to feel this way, I don't deserve to smile or move on ever.

You are probably wondering by now what I have done to feel like this? What my mistake was? Why I hate myself? And I will tell you. But to do that I need to start at the beginning, from my first memories, for the story to make sense both to you and me. See I am not only writing this for a reader to read, but so I can understand myself the events of my life and how I ended up the way I am now. I don't think it will change anything, but I'm doing it for the person I care most about in this world, the only person I truly have left, the one person I can't lose, and the person I still live for. I have to do this for them, so they can feel they have helped me... and you never know maybe I will get something out of this. I remain both hopeful, and cynical.

So here goes…


End file.
